Without You !

How hard is it to accept? To accept the change in your life, to accept that someone is gone; maybe for now or maybe Forever! Not so easy my friend. Things change, slowly everything and everyone in your life is replaced. You tend to lose it all, but the only hope that shall keep you going; is something better is on its way. But how long shall you continue to go with the flow? Doesn’t it prick you at some end, with all the time you waited and the patience you kept? Till when shall you let go things, lose everything you had and left with just one abstract feeling: mere hope!

Like those shattered broken hearts, who gave it up in the end; I was one among the lot. I lost those I loved, cared for with nothing in return but the only need of their permanent presence in life. But as they say it, nothing is permanent. They came and left and I lived with a hope that someday someone shall come, who’ll stay till I survive; or as they call it ‘forever’. I waited for someone to come, and now that I lost everyone; I give up.

I have given up faith in Whom the world resides, I have given up hope in every being, I have forgotten the feeling of love and being loved; and I’m only surviving. I changed, every time someone left but no one noticed why I changed; just that I did. Couldn’t someone wait and ask, wasn’t someone concerned? Was it me who made the wrong choices or was I dying inside. But, Karma has its own plans. Something happened, someone noticed; and maybe that someone had come. Maybe he was the One I awaited for so long! 

He said he cared as a friend, I did too. Friendship wasn’t why he came; he came to make me fall in love with him, everyone, and everything and to make me realize it’s a beautiful life I have been gifted with. I was scared from the feeling to fall in love, for every time I loved- I thereby lost. I was trembled by his sore touch, by the way things were going; like everything was about to be something different; something I had never experienced before. If only my past hadn’t frightened me, I would have been His. For once I wouldn’t have faked the smile, for once I would have held his clasp and walked this path of life together.

But i could never keep love. I could never keep someone or let him stay by me forever. One mistake shall bring things back. That one denial has got me here; to the gloominess, to the shiver in my hands, lacking hope and happiness; for it shall never be Me and You- Cause without me it’s just a pessimistic little ‘Me’.. It was always ‘You’ that made ‘Me’ complete.